E.Z. RinskyFeb 11, 20201 min readHow to prepare for Corona outbreak:1) Buy enough bottled water for one final bubble bath.2) Familiarize yourself with Corona symptoms, never sleep again.3) Hoard condoms and Clif bars—these will be post-apocalyptic currency.4) Prepare Corona jokes to lighten the mood in bunker5) Practice putting yourself, others, out of their misery.6) Sell valuable appliances; you can replace them during the looting.7) Comb religious texts for allusions to virus and try to get a book deal out of it.8) Before causing mass hysteria, confirm you haven’t eaten beets recently.
1) Buy enough bottled water for one final bubble bath.2) Familiarize yourself with Corona symptoms, never sleep again.3) Hoard condoms and Clif bars—these will be post-apocalyptic currency.4) Prepare Corona jokes to lighten the mood in bunker5) Practice putting yourself, others, out of their misery.6) Sell valuable appliances; you can replace them during the looting.7) Comb religious texts for allusions to virus and try to get a book deal out of it.8) Before causing mass hysteria, confirm you haven’t eaten beets recently.